Chapter 4 fear and well-being,

In my last blog I shared my thoughts on Love and the positive impact a healthy true love can have on well-being. Some say the opposite emotion of love is fear.
It is difficult to face our fears but unacknowledged fear is toxic.

 I have noted from my work and from my own personal reflections that so very often the root of anger, bitterness, resentment, sadness is actually fear.

Love is strong, secure, concerned with others over oneself, it is happy, calm, it helps growth, it is productive, it is generous.

Fear is selfish, insecure, weak, self absorbed, inhibits productivity and growth, it is the reversal of each aspect of the dynamics of love.

All through the day our actions, the choices we make are either coming from a place of love or fear. For instance a very simple example of this for me is to do with the dishwasher!
 I'm not so keen on unloading it, in fact all those unglamorous jobs, dishes, taking bins out etc they're not my favourite things to do.
If I'm acting from a place of love I do these things because I want to care for those around me, I want to ease their day, I want to demonstrate my love in an act of service. It doesn't take long and I am cheerful in my task. I can feel happy and at peace whilst doing something I'm not keen on.
If I do the same task coming from a place of fear, where I feel I have to do the task to prove my worth, to feel good enough then I would not feel cheerful in my task, I would feel bitter, feel like the martyr and this is no good for my well-being or for those around me! It is about being willing to stop trying to prove that we are a good person and just being that good person.

 When we act out of love we are open and honest, when we act out fear we are closed and shallow. It is scary to look deeply at our motivations, to face our fears. I think acceptance is key, acceptance of ourselves and others, to feel worthy despite imperfections and to then have the confidence to be vulnerable. In vulnerability we can give and receive love deeply, we can ensure our actions are coming from a place of love and we can face and challenge the fears and anxities that lurk within us.

In even the smallest moments in life we can reject fear and choose love.